Insert Witty Title Here.

Insert Snappy Follow Up, And Thought Provoking Sentence Here.

I want to tell you all what a great success I've been. I want to spread my happiness through these words, so they touch your hearts and warm them. I'm not quite able to do such things yet.

I'm at 125.0 as of February 1st. This number is one I shall never, ever, see again. I'm still all over the place. Again with plan after plan. Only to give up two days in. With running, with raw food, with working out. None of it more then three days. I want to tell you all, once more, that this will stop as of now. But it wont. I know so. I'm motivated with school work, only to sit and stare at it. I'm making slow, very slow, progress. But I sapoce progress is just that. The job search is endless. And I'm starting to believe that I am in-fact getting call backs, but my mother isn't answering the phone when I'm not home. I'm going bat crazy. I've been here, far far too long. i need my own space. And moving tomorrow would still be too far away. I'm sick of abbotsford. I'm sick of my job, and my mother. I'm sick of being a year behind my friends. I'm sick of being sick.

I'm studying Wednesday with kimmy. For my N test. I figure I have to take it. Now. I'll BS my way through my passport papers to get them done as well. Two small children, one stone kinda deal. This weekend there is the fleamarket to deal with as well, And Hopefully Kick Boxing. I feel distressed, but perhaps thats not the word I'm looking for. Every plan I make, seems to fall through. Be it home work at another's house, or good intentions of going some where, or doing something. And no, I don't think moving on my own will help that at all. I just need to get away. Its all become routine again. I'm hiding in my room to avoid, at all costs, my mother.

Its hard trying to catch up to everyone else. Trying to be that girl dating the smart older guy. They think I'm the ditz. Working at a dead end job for minimum wage, and wining over diet soda..