Derp-Derp-Derpy Hooves

I haven't been sober in a week or so. It's not enough. But then again, nothing ever is.

Since my last post, *deep inhale..* I've finished all my school work, got two new tattoo's, moved in to a house, destroyed two bikes, bought a new one, destroyed that with paint.. *whew* Yeah, I know I should be updating more.. but I really have been all over the place, never in a good way.. 

I've done four lines today.

Three yesterday. 

And two on Wednesday.

I can't handle all this. I'm not sure if drugs will make it better, but it can't be worse then how it is now. 

I know I'm all over the place because of my medication. But I'm snapping like crazy at Yannic, when he is being noting but helpful and calm with me. 

I don't know how to handle any of this. 

I don't want this medication. I don't even remember what it feels like with out it. 

Why am I going crazy? 

My life isn't so bad, it's going really well as of late in fact. 

Why can't I be happy?